Birth Story Time!

I asked one of our doula clients to share her amazing birth story (and VBAC victory) with you. This story starts with a first, cesarean birth experience that left a lot to be desired for Cori. It follows up with a TOLAC that became a VBAC that eventually became part of the saving grace that brought baby Simon into the world healthy, strong, and in the very best environment to care for his unexpected diagnosis of obstructive sleep apnea— a condition that is often undetected until much later in a baby’s life but thanks to Cori’s amazing instincts and her supportive birth team (including her partner and doulas, nurses, and doctors) Cori’s amazing birth became the very best beginning for Simon and a very emotionally healing journey for her as a mother.

Enjoy this tender, heartfelt, raw and real sharing of Cori’s VBAC journey.

🌱 Birth Story for Baby #1 🌱

Cori begins…. “I want to start with sharing the story of my first son's birth because in a way, I feel that was not over until my second was born. I got pregnant with my first born in July 2021 and had a healthy pregnancy, though it was not easy. I was sick for most of it, nothing bad enough to get sent to the hospital, but it was rough.

Despite it being rough, I wanted to wait for spontaneous labor, but at 41+4, we decided to do an induction. When I got to the hospital the following evening, we sang "weird hotel, weird hotel, staying the night at a weird hotel" to the tune of the spiderman song. I got a nurse who looked like she was 18 years old. We went over my birth plan. When I asked for gas & air she said- oh that doesn't really work. I knew it did, but being there then, for some reason I chose to believe her and crossed that off my birth plan.

After going over my birth plan she tried to place an IV several times in my arm and kept missing. I had bruises on my arms for weeks after his birth. Eventually, she placed some dose of misoprostol in me and 1 hour later my water broke and I had already dilated from 0.5 cm to 4 cm. I couldn't really feel any contractions for most of that, so I thought it would be ok, but soon after she checked me and announced 4 cm, the contractions were really really intense.

We walked over to one of the labor rooms. I asked for an epidural and a glass of water and we did not end up seeing that nurse or any nurse for 2 hours. I labored the best I could with my husband present. I wanted to be on the floor, but was tethered to an IV pole that didn't stretch far enough for me to do that. Outside our door we could hear beeps indicating coding noises. At this point in time, I asked if my mom, who was in the waiting area could come join us in our room. She was able to come in the room and a nurse came back and told me the anesthetist was unavailable and I would have to wait for an epidural.

Meanwhile my mom kept talking about how she had to have c-sections with me and my brother and recounting her trauma while I was in labor. My contractions at that point were about 30 seconds apart and lasting each a minute. I felt like I might die. Eventually, after many hours of just taking comfort in imagery that helped me disconnect from my body and trying to smell my husband's neck (don't know why that worked...), the nurse came in with the epidural guy and checked me. She said I was 9 cm dilated. She also said something along the lines of - this is your last chance for this epidural, if you don't get it now you'll feel that ring of fire.

So I was pressured into getting it. I liked it for like 10 minutes until I realized that it really only worked on half my body and seemed to significantly slow things down. It took me another couple hours to get to 10 cm. At that point I was directed to push laying on my back. The nurse "wouldn't let me" be on my side because she said it would make the epidural less effective. She let me try a few times on my side, but kept trying to convince me to go back to my back. The doctor who ordered the misoprostol came in at that moment to tell me that another doctor would "deliver me" because her shift was up or something. She also said, "I even gave you twice the dose of misoprostol because I wanted to deliver your baby tonight." Later on I found out this is why my contractions were likely so horrible and close together.

The new doctor came in and told me- oh your baby is posterior, if he stays that way he probably won’t come out, so we have to turn him. If we cannot turn him, then you will need a c-section because his head could be miss-shapen. He tried to turn him, but did not succeed. I only pushed for about an hour total. I was being thrown paperwork for the c-section, while a nurse said "gonna give you a free bikini wax-ok?" and at the same time another nurse I had not met yet told me that the other nurse had accidentally placed a latex catheter in me (which I am allergic to and was charted).

They shipped me off on my bed to the OR and told my husband to bring out stuff to a postpartum room. I was terrified. On the way I told them that the epidural only worked on one side and they said I was just feeling anxious. I asked again when we got to the OR and then someone said that's what the morphine was for. The nurse I had was standing at the bedside crying. My husband finally got there at some point and while I was shaking and trying to keep my arms out I waited for the longest 10 minute of my life. When my baby was born I was so out of it on morphine that I didn't care to hold him and felt like a horrible mother when they placed him on me and I felt literally no love for him. I started feeling love for him pretty quickly as the morphine wore off, but also didn't want him out of my sight.

I sang to him and kissed his little hands while feeling a total loss of self. I didn't want anyone else to hold him. This was the beginning of 4 months of severe postpartum anxiety. I was able to work through this trauma with the help of a skilled therapist, breathing, and learning enough about the birth industry to make me feel more mad than sad. Then we decided to have another kid!”

Cori’s VBAC Victory!

“I danced with my husband and yelled like a Yeti. This positive birth was so important given what followed in our story….”

🌱 Birth Story for Baby #2 🌱

“I got pregnant when my first son was about 13 months old. I looked into having a doula immediately and found Erica and Nurture. I had some light nausea in my first trimester but got great advice about stomaching protein instead of following the BRAT diet (previously advised to me by doctors in my first pregnancy). I delved deep into the literature about VBAC-ing and read books about hypnobirthing.

I did guided meditations every day throughout my whole pregnancy with a few days where I just practised breathing for a few minutes if I didn't have too much time. When I got to the end of the pregnancy (around 36 weeks) I became nervous that my baby would be too big and Erica and some other friends helped me through these thoughts. I loved the end of pregnancy so much. I spent quality time with my oldest son and actually had Braxton-Hicks that felt quite euphoric. I hadn't felt any Braxton Hicks with my first. I started pumping twice a day at 38 weeks to help ripen my cervix. I saw a chiropractor throughout my pregnancy but a few extra times at the end. I saw a pelvic floor therapist who showed me how my pelvic floor specifically responds to different breathing and what breathing would be most effective for pushing and I practiced that (on the potty). I saw an acupuncturist just shy of 39 weeks pregnant for labor prep and got a sweep at the doc's.

I started feeling mild cramping. The next week, I woke up having remembered a beautiful dream about having my baby very quickly and easily and also about buying a very fancy house. I woke up with cramps. I got a sweep at the doc and headed to a prenatal massage at nurture (courtesy of my mother in law, I love her very much). My braxton hicks and cramps turned into contractions shortly after that a I thought it was go-time, but my contractions were never closer than 8 minutes apart and were mostly 10-30 minutes apart. I thought- crap! I'm not in real labor!!!! I got really down after this lasted over 24 hours.

I called Erica and talked about how down I felt about it and she said the way I was breathing sounded more like active labor. We all decided that because it was snowing and the roads might get slick that I should leave for the hospital sooner than later. I read the book "Silly Sally" to my son in between contractions that were indeed getting closer together. We put him to bed and then headed to the hospital. The car ride was magical. There was snow covering all the trees. I thought we would be sent home when I wasn't having contractions. When I was, I was worried I might have the baby in the car. I got to triage and they checked me quickly. I was 8 cm dilated.

Phoebe got there and she and my husband gave me pressure in places that made the increasingly difficult contractions quite manageable again. We got to our labor room and they put together a pool for me to labor in and I went to use the bathroom and started feeling pushy.

I danced with my husband and yelled like a Yeti. People started asking me what position I wanted to give birth in. I hated the idea of the hospital bed. I only wanted to be on all fours on the ground on a yoga mat. I learned to push and it was the most painful thing ever and also quite pleasurable. I didn't believe I would be able to push my baby out. My water broke and it felt like a huge relief for a minute until baby's bones settled back in around my pelvis. All of the sudden my body was doing everything and my brain turned off. I pushed and pushed and honestly believed my baby would get stuck. My doula Phoebe told me that I literally said “I promise this baby isn’t coming out” when she could see the head… ha! Then they got the baby warmer out and I could feel the baby's head coming out.

Maybe 10 contractions later my son came out and I held him and I felt euphoric and happy. He was 9lbs 6oz and 21 inches. My birth felt legendary and redemptive. We named our baby Simon.

This positive birth was so important given what followed in our story.”

🌱 Simon’s NICU Journey 🌱

“After he was born he didn't eat really well and made some funny noises. I thought little of it since my first sounded like a pug when he breathed and was fine. We decided to circumcise him the next morning so that we could be discharged that evening. After his snip, he was a bit upset but I was set on having a very quick shower. My husband was out grabbing himself lunch and a shower, so I asked a wonderful nurse who had basically done a photoshoot of my placenta (she randomly offered) if she might hold Simon while I took a world record speedy shower. She did and he calmed down. A couple minutes later when I got out of the shower he was snoozing peacefully in her arms, but she told me- hear this sound? I don’t like it and I would like to check his oxygen levels. So we did and his oxygen saturation was around 78-92, but never higher. So, Simon was admitted to the NICU.

I will not go too in depth with this story, but will say he was eventually diagnosed with obstructive sleep apnea, which is notoriously under-diagnosed in term infants, because they tend to be awake and angry when they are getting their vitals checked and getting visited by doctors, etc... Because he was on oxygen immediately (no more than 18 hours after his birth), he will no have no developmental issues and will not be at an elevated risk of mental health disorders. He will be a normal boy (or as normal as you get in our family). We had a 3 week NICU stay and I will say that it is worthwhile preparing for that eventuality when planning your birth, but you don’t need to think about it too much. Just make sure you plan to add your baby to your insurance ASAP and invest in a nice journal and pen to journal your thoughts about what you are going through. Honestly, good advice for any part of life. If someone is reading this and is worried about the NICU as a possibility please feel free to reach out! Erica can give you my info.” 

Cori believes that Simon’s VBAC gave him the very best start with a diagnosis they did not at all see coming!

“Anyway, we have been home now with our son on home oxygen. He will need to wear a little baby cannula and we will have to shlep oxygen tanks with us for 6-12 months, but it feels as natural as diaper changes and burping at this point. His special breathing needs have not interfered with our lives other than long distance travel plans, which I am a bit happy to excuse myself from conferences and have family come visit us instead of us visiting them. 

Simon is really cute, smiley, and curious. To be honest, I am already a bit excited for having a third baby, but trying not to get ahead of myself. 

I have so many people to thank for this positive experience other than myself. This takes a village and I was so happy to have Erica and her very nurturing people be a huge part of my village.”

🌱 Hypnobirth & Hypnoparent🌱

“Also hypnobirthing is just what you need to handle all of life’s challenges, especially parenting challenges, which birth is the first official parenting challenge, I believe. We are so blessed to be able to have all sorts of experiences, to have the ability to learn and heal from all the negative ones, and to feel empowered by the positive ones. For anyone who is pregnant and reading this: you will have an awesome birth. For me birth is hard and can be scary at times, but it is also hilarious and pleasurable at times, so long as I do the work to know how to calm myself and have a good laugh. A good doula (Phoebe) also helped a lot (: Both my births were transformative, but this one I considered what I wanted that transformation to feel like, knowing from my first birth that I couldn’t know what it would look like.”